For any parent, one of the most daunting aspects of an international move is managing your child’s education. Our co-founder, Nadine has been speaking a lot recently on the WheresHome Instagram about her families move from Dubai back to the UK, including the process of moving schools for her 3 little boys. Like every parent, you want to ensure the school is right for your child but with an international move you’ve also got the added stress of this huge transition from not only one country to another but also a new culture and new school system; the children may have been raised differently, speak differently – your child might perhaps even be dealing with a new language. We’re asking a lot of our little people here! Even small steps can go a long way in ensuring the transition is as smooth for them as possible. There is a lot for little minds to worry about, but a lot to be excited for too. Hopefully our quick tips will help you and your little one with the transition in to your new school life and help them to really embrace all that’s exciting and fun about such a big change.
The power of choice
Where possible, ensure your little one feels an element of control in the decisions around their new school. For an older teen, this might run as deeply as asking them to research and propose to you any schools they like. For tweens, creating a shortlist and taking them along to the open days and having open discussions around where they prefer is a great balance. And for younger ones, involvement will vary hugely based on what you feel they are capable of comprehending but it could be as subtle as ensuring they get power of choice over their new pencil case up to taking them to the open days like you would for a tween. Whatever you do, as long as you feel your child will feel empowered and not overwhelmed by being involved, giving them the power of choice really cements the idea that they are the centre of this process which often makes the transition much easier. It’s one thing for a child to feel they have been ‘sent’ somewhere but it’s a whole other experience if they feel they are starting somewhere new that they actively chose to go to. Even tiny steps can ensure your child feels they have some autonomy over their education and it can really make all the difference in the context of a big move where they ultimately have very little say.
Communication is everything
As mentioned above, keep them involved as much as is feasible. But within that, ensure your excitement for them is palpable and try to keep any of your own anxieties around the application process at bay. Equally, ensure there is time and space for them to express any anxieties or worries they have themselves. As parents we just want our children to be happy, and as such when we know they are about to go through something mildly traumatic it’s easy to be overly-positive and to just keep reminding them about all the positives. But there is an element of selfishness in that as it ultimately doesn’t stop them feeling sad, but can often stop them from feeling they can communicate that sadness, which leads us to our next point.
Don’t rush them to forget their old school
Actively help them to process the leaving process from their old school. Big moves ARE exciting and there are HUGE positives and new experiences and fantastic cultural exchanges to be had – but that doesn’t change the simple fact that it’s a very big deal to our little people and often the biggest emotional shift they’ve had in their little lives. Perhaps make them a photobook of their time at their old school or help them build a scrapbook to take in and have their friends write messages in it. If your child is too young for social media or Whatsapp, be sure to take any contact details of the families they were closest to so they can stay in contact. Honouring this process for them gives them space to feel all the feelings because we know bottling it up never ends well! Hopefully by being allowed to ‘grieve’ their old school, your setting them up for being ready and open to the new experiences and exciting future at their brilliant new school!
Discuss the transition with their old and new school
Possible politics and practical reasons aside, it’s always a good idea to let your child’s current school know a decent amount of time in advance that their student will be moving. They will have dealt with school transitions numerous times and hopefully they will help in the process of preparing your child. Schools are there to provide support and it’s crucial they remain positive and encouraging. For the new school, speak to their admissions team and see if they have any child-focused resources to give to your child about their new school, and ask what strategies they tend to use for newcomers – hopefully you can then replicate these things at home and at least then everyone is on the same page.
Prioritise wellness
